A Month Ago...

A month and two days ago I looked like this in the last picture taken before my water broke...A month and two days ago if you had asked me then how I felt about being pregnant, I would have told you that I felt fat, ugly, and couldn't wait to be done. Little did I know as I sat on the beach with my family that my pregnant experience would shortly be over and that I would today see women well into their pregnancies and find myself jealous that I don't get to be uncomfortable, swollen, and cute like them.

A month and two days ago, I didn't know that in pregnancy's place I would be grateful to have a child that by all accounts is healthy and perfect. Adam's well being is something that I worried about from the moment he arrived. One of the things I didn't mention in telling the story of Adam's birth was the reason behind Adam's sudden drop in heart rate and quick entry into the world. Tiny, purple, and quiet, Adam was followed unexpectedly by another object. "Was that her placenta?" I heard a surprised voice ask. The doctor looked and confirmed that it had followed on it's own. It was at that time that the doctor realized that my placenta had abrupted, or torn away from the "wall" it was attached to. The moment that happened the baby lost all nutrients and oxygen, causing the heart rate drop and everything that followed. Most of us who know how to tie our shoes also know that without oxygen we cannot survive. The neonatologist came in shortly after Adam was stable and explained that he had been without oxygen and that, while the less important organs, like the intestines, usually shut down first when the oxygen goes, because they didn't know how long Adam had been without oxygen they couldn't say whether there would be permanent damage to the brain. Scary.

A month and two days later, I am grateful that my little Adam is here and has so far passed every developmental task given him, indicating more and more that there was and is no damage to our little guy's brain. I am so grateful for answers to prayers, for the prayers of others, and for the stressful blessing this experience has been in our lives. While I am grateful I am also excited for the day, in about a week, that Adam comes home and that working brain of his can start on the path of learning to crawl, talk, and occasionally drive me crazy. I can't wait!

Changes

What a difference a week makes. Through this process Adam has continued to do much better than expected, but he made some significant progress in this last week...

Adam moved out of his first bed, the Isolette and into an open bed!!

The bed transition occurred because he is gaining weight, finally topping the 4lb mark and swiftly moving to today's weight of 4lbs 7 oz. This marks a 1lb gain from his birth weight and about 1.5 lbs from his lowest weight of 3 lbs 2 oz. He looks almost chubby in this picture I snapped of him today. Hard to believe he is still just shy of being HALF the weight Noah was when he was born.Our next bit of progress is up to you to spot. Look closely at the following two pictures... Now check out the next couple...Did you spot the difference yet? If not, let me help you out - he had his oxygen removed and is breathing completely on his own!! You'll notice he still has his feeding tube, but his last bit of weekly progress is that he started eating this week! He is doing amazing and I am hoping we will be able to see his entire face clear of tubes soon!

The three criteria for being able to get him home are:

Weight gain

Maintaining body temperature

Eating on his own

The key is getting all three working together at the same time, so if we can keep this feeding thing going, and he can keep up with the other two, we hope to have him home in about two weeks. 28 days in and with the bill topping $100,000 we are hoping for sooner rather than later! Glass half full moment - we have REALLY could insurance and will only pay a fraction of that amount.

In other news - as life does go on outside of the hospital - our other two kids have had some fun changes this week too. Chloe started soccer! She has been asking and asking to play and as a former soccer star myself (haha).... I have been excited to see her learn. Unfortunately she panicked a little when we first arrived.Fortunately she got over it, played, scored three goals, and LOVES it! Adam isn't the only one who switched beds this week. After getting Chloe a "big girl" twin bed and moving the toddler bed into Noah's room, we finally convinced him to try it out. What a big boy!

This picture above illustrates what I would most like to be doing most of the time - sleeping! I just have to remind myself that once Adam comes home I will get less, not more sleep. At least I can stay in my pajamas all day if I want to!

Glass Half Full

Just over two weeks in, and I am already so so so sick of hospitals! My kids on the other hand have thought that having baby brother there is pretty cool - aside from the mom and dad being gone alot part. When I was in the hospital post partum, some of the highlights they found great enjoyment in were:

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Eating at the hospital cafeteria (which is actually pretty yummy) and pretty much getting any treat they asked for

Cuddle time with mom without having a big belly get in the way anymore Working on the ever important kung-fu skills
Playing with the super cool hospital bed buttons

Getting to take a picture of mom by themselves to celebrate getting released

While the kids have celebrated me being home from the hospital I am having a hard time splitting my time between my children at home and my child in the hospital. The adrenaline has worn off and now there are days where I am just overwhelmed. This morning I had to remind myself that there will come a day where I will get to walk out of the hospital with my sweet Adam in tow. Basically I'm surviving on finding "Glass half full moments." Some of them include:

For as early as Adam arrived he has had miraculously smooth sailing so far with no major problems coming up - my fingers are crossed that that remains the same

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Carrying a baby for only 30 weeks means less baby weight to lose!

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I've had the baby but I get to sleep through the night

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I have wonderful friends and family that have been SO supportive and helpful

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I didn't have to make dinner for two weeks (although the fact that every meal included dessert may negate the bonus of having less baby weight to lose as I have surely put some back on)

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We live within 10 minutes of the hospital

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Those are just a few of the moments that help me see the postive in life right now. The biggest is the comfort I feel from a Heavenly Father who loves me and knows I can survive this even when there are moments where I am in doubt.

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Adam IS doing so well and that is really a blessing. I have been amazed to watch him already start to develop and progress and look at each growth as a step closer to him coming home.

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So far Adam loves using his hands. Most of that use comes in trying to pull the oxygen out of his nose, but occasionally he does find his mouth

With the loss of his umbilical cord, Adam has moved past spongebath stage to actual baths. He actually enjoys them and the nurses tell me that he is generally very easy going with all the poking and prodding he is subjected to. Lets hope that nature remains the same when he gets home and is subjected to the poking and prodding of an older brother and sister.

He has been upgraded to getting to wear clothing which he looks so cute in! I wish I could capture a picture on camera to convey how adorable he is, but so far he loves to blink or wink almost every time I think I have the perfect shot. From his not wanting to pose for pictures to his smirks at me when his oxygen levels dip, I think Adam is going to be a little tease, which he's going to need if he wants to survive in our family!

Hop On Board the Animal Train

My kids have a toy train that, as it moves, sings "Hop on board the animal train, everyone..." Last night, in an effort to combine Noah's desire to be pulled in a wagon, and Chloe's to ride a four wheeler, Joe created a "train" that almost everyone enjoyed a ride on: