...In with the new

Today my mind is filled with lots of other thoughts, but most of them are not the most positive and I just can't let my first post of the year be sad or depressing. So instead I focus on something not at all sad, and only sometimes depressing - the new year.

Every year feels like a fresh start, a chance to start fresh or be better (which is where the depressing can come in if you aren't quite acheiving these new goals) than you were in the previous year. As the new year approached I have tried to think about things I could do to improve my life. For Joe this year it's to cut down on sweets and exercise more. For Chloe it's to learn to read. For Noah it's to control his feelings a little better. For Adam it's to learn to string his few words into something known as a sentence. Okay so Adam's is actually mine for him but without the sentence ability he couldn't tell me anyway. As I think about mine for me, that's where I struggle.

There are many days where I feel like I could do or be better, but when I sit back and look at my life, I realize how much I have. I have a wonderful husband who, although I wouldn't have guessed it years ago, is my perfect match. I have three beautiful children who make my days happy. I am blessed to have wonderful parents and siblings on both sides of our family. I have the worlds best friends ever. I live in a nice home, driving cars that work, wearing clothes that keep me warm, eating food that overfills my tummy. Here's the problem, so many people look at the new year as a time to change their lives and, while the improvements I listed above for my family are great and important steps in life, there is nothing I want to change. Having all that's listed above means I have everything I could ever want and for that I feel blessed.

So while I daily resolve to be a better, stronger, kinder person, my resolution for this year is to enjoy what I have. To appreciate the moments that make my life happy. To hold on to gratitude for all my blessings. To make those people that make my life great feel like they are great. For who cares if I run a half marathon this year in under two hours. Who cares if I can go an entire year without desserts. Who cares if I plan the best Young Women's camp ever, if the people and things that matter most to me aren't enjoyed. If I can keep that promise, to be more aware of all I have, then this and every year will be a happy new year.